The power of the Shankaracharya

Srinivasan took out the wooden box that lay untouched within his puja room and laid it on the floor. He stared at it closely and thought to himself over the many circumstances that had brought him this far. He looked up at the little home he had made with great care for the Lord to be housed in and now it was the most important thing he would guard, because his soul was in there protected and safe.

In the early hours of the morning before the sun rose, Srinivasan lit a small ghee lamp and incense and placed it next to the box. His heart beat fast as he slowly opened it. Within it lay a few items of puja, a yellow cloth and in its center in a cloth bed lay a piece of bamboo. It was smeared in turmeric and had a lot of threads rolled around it. He picked it up carefully and laid it on the floor. He whispered a prayer to himself and bowed to it, holding both the corners. Srinivasan was surprized as he had never felt this before. His arms shook as they could not withstand the energy that flowed through them. He was unable to hold the bamboo, as his arms trembled. With humility he raised himself up again and placed the piece of bamboo back into the box.

Srinivasan looked up to the Lord seated within the chamber of his little throne. He wondered what spiritualism was, what the energy of the Lord was and who he was as a drop of atman floating in this consciousness in this universe at this time in this space. He closed his eyes and a mantra of the three eyed Shiva flowed into his mind. He looked up at the slab of vilva wood that lay within the chamber. He had heard a story about it.

There was a saint who walked the earth in these times and touched the souls of everyone with his humility. It was one morning at his ashram that he walked up to a vilva tree and sat under it. In a while the tree descended to lie next to him. He spent hours with the tree in divine conversation, unmoved, unshaken and in complete deep thought. After a long time, he turned and asked his pupil to get a peice of bamboo shaped as an axe. The dying tree was cut, and each part of its trunk was made into a slap and given to his disciples with instructions to give it to anyone worthy of it.


Srinivasan looked back at the spiritual journey he had made in his life. He meditated over these simple things that had far more value than gold. He revered his Guru, the symbolism of whose he worshiped before he started his prayers to the Supreme. He had heard great stories about the Mahatma, of his appearance well after he had left his earthly self. He had revisited his disciples, and instructed them about their activities. He had blessed them and disappeared. All they ever saw was the sacred Dandam (staff) that represented the great Shankaras stand in front of them held by a hand mid air in space.
This was the great emblem of the Shankaras, a bamboo staff that was so simple to look at but so sacred that its energy could be felt within the mind when it was clean and immersed in divine love for the Guru. It was the staff of enlightenment that represented the ending symbol of every mantra written. It was the staff of knowledge that represented the supreme guru who is the solution to our earthly presence and our learning about quality life.

The great staff, is what we limited human beings are able to see because this is the only visible symbolism of the other world, the celestial world and the empowering knowledge that it comes with feeding our thoughts with divine wisdom. This is the dandam of the Shankaracharya. This is the emblem of wisdom and this is the power of learning that we lesser mortals need to worship. The truth is, the Lord is not out there, but he is in here within us and the noise of our worldly problems is the Maya that bars us from listening to his silence.

He awakens the other world, that which is fed by words and sustained by imagination, that which is invisible and needs to be sort after, that which speaks in silence and disappears in noise, that which is felt with emotion and logic, that which has rules that are never broken, that which always was and never changed, that which springs from deep rooted energy that gives us life, that which neither you nor I have ever cared to understand.

Srinivasan thought to himself, as he stood at the gates of his own divine world of imagination like a gatekeeper who guarded because he believed but didnt really know what was inside. He felt like a blessed ignorant fool, holding a diamond in his hand and not believing so because it didnt shine!

Tears rolled down his eyes as he stared on at the divine, he felt miserable that this was he, and he felt happy that at least he had come this far and now this was he. He felt the dualism in his existence, he felt the incompleteness in his form, he felt the inprisonment in his flesh and he experienced the dumb ignorance within his mind. This was he, this is he and hopefully will not continue to be him.

Bhava, an emotional language of divine Love

Along the stone walls Srinivasan walked, trying to listen to the sound reverberating within them. People busily rushed ahead of him, pushing him aside trying to catch that quick glimpse of the Lord. They walk out just as fast as they stepped in and he wondered whether they ever even cast an eye with reverence on this beautiful form of the Lord, for if they did that, they wouldnt even want to come out of this sacred earthly home.

Srinivasan now made his way towards Lord Shiva's shrine. The place, a mundane temple with a mundane idol with mundane people on a mundane day, there was nothing special about it and yet he felt something different. He had been here before, he knew every form of every God in here and yet the ambience within seemed to welcome him, a little different and yet special welcome that he seemed to have longed for.

He stepped in, catching the first glimpse of the Lord seated on his throne, his earthly peetha within the sanctum. His heart melted, and his eyes welled up with tears though he couldn't understand why he felt such emotion. The fire within the sanctum looked pure, the Lord looked simple yet divine in his attire and the air inside felt still.

He stared at the lamp lights dance graciously around the Lord, he thought hard looking at the fire...

The fire burns gentle as a lamp light for the Lord
The fire burns hard as it eats into flesh turning it to ash

The water, pure and crystal clear bathes the Lord
This same water consumes the ashes of man to deliver him to heaven

The air is here still and fragrant with floral offerings and incense
The same air is a grim reminder of death as the pyre burns

The earth holds the shakti of these earthly shrines
The same earth gives a bed for the burning departed soul

The ethereal presence of the Lord in his home here is felt so strong
The same ethereal state is so hard to achieve.

Srinivasan looked up as the priest held up the arti within. The flames lit up the glowing face of the Lord, among the flowers and vilva that decked his form. Srinivasan's heart was heavy with emotion, for he didnt know how to perceive the Lord anymore. This was strange love, love that made him suffer, love that made him ache to leave his earthly self and want to be ever present at the Lord's feet.

Srinivasan had had mixed emotions towards the Lord, he harboured various feelings towards the Lord and each expression of love made the Lord play various roles deep within his emotions. He felt Santa Bhava, where he was the eternal child, in the lap of the Lord who loved him and protected him as his very own. He felt he had been cursed to now live with this limited consciousness so far away from his divine father.

Srinivasan felt like a willing slave, the eternal servant who wished he could bathe and decorate all those present within the sanctum of the Lord. He wished he could live within, in the temple lighting the lamps, singing hymns to the Lord, bathing his various forms, the Trimurti, Kala Bhairava, Devi, Lingodhbhava, the 63 Nayanars, Ganesha, and the numerous Shiva Lingas that dotted the heavenly precinct. He craved to perform alankara, to drape the Lord in silks and flowers and sing to him in devotion as he decorated him. What enormous pleasure he would get to just clothe the Lord in his sacred garments and be his faithful servant. He felt a deep sense of Dasya Bhava as he humbly folded his hands in front of the Lord.

Srinivasan had felt Sakhya bhava, at rare moments when he had mentally demanded the Lord's attention as his closest friend whose help he needed. He had called His name to help him in his moments of distress. He called to the Lord, looking for him in desperation as he helplessly faced his circumstances. His heart was overwhelmed with the experience he had felt when the Lord listened and gave him the solution in the most unusual way possible. He whispered in his thoughts leaving Srinivasan awestruck that such experiences are even possible.

But most of all he felt love, pure love. The type of love that made him want to live every day with enthusiasm because he felt that Lord Shiva was always with him. He felt it in the events that unfolded in the day, he felt it in the way people reacted towards him, he felt it in the air that surrounded him, Lord Shiva was always there. His faith towards Lord Shiva was unshakable, his love for the lord was undying and his attitude towards the lord was one of protection and loving care. He felt the sweetness in the experience, he felt beauty in his presence and the thought of the Lord next to him made him divinely estatic. This was madhurya bhava. Eternal love, eternal bliss where the Lord occupied every thought in his mind.

Srinivasan walked around the shrine, circumambulating it and adouring every form of the Lord he crossed. He looked up with reverence and respect towards every saint present in there wondering whether he would ever reach that state.

He walked up to Nataraja, he had never seen someone so handsome, so charming, so graceful and yet so peaceful. His heart yarned for the Lord, Nataraja, Oh how he wished he could step onto that stage and dance with him, witness the grace of Ananda Tandava, be a part of the grand Shiva family that resides here within these walls.

Srinivasan's heart ached as he moved away from Nataraja, for he felt Nataraja looked straight at him, he felt the charm envelop him, he felt the presence awaken him like a dialog that seemed to rise within himself, between them as they stared at each other. He was numb with bliss, he was overwhelmed with love, he was sinking into a pool of ecstacy. Such love had never overpowered his emotions, such love had never made his feet weak, such love had never made him swoon so much. This was honey sweet, this was beyond words, this was paradise on earth, this was beyond the maya of mundane life... this was consciousness.

Photo courtesy:
Flickr Photo stream: shrirang k

Gaumukh, bringing the Ganges home

||Om Aham Gangai Mata Namaskaromi||

Gaumukh is the source of the river Bhagirathi that flows from the melting glacier feeding the Ganges as it heads out towards earth, towards Bhuloka into our world. It is a silent world of purity where the pranava mantra(Om) echoes in the stream, in its ripples and within the walls of the cave through which she flows. The air is fresh, cold, and pure, awakening our senses towards its presence in the winds that dance among the rocks in this little paradise. There is silence, peace and tranquility here as I sit among these rocks and close my eyes, listening intently to the sounds in this world, in this realm of life that is so rare to find.

The smoothness of the rock echoes the gentleness of the damsel as she dances her way down from the heavy locks of Lord Shiva's jatas into the realm of mankind. The tiny pebbles scattered around bring alive the shimmering jewelery that toss around her waist, emphasizing the feminine beauty she carries with herself. The ripples of the melting stream bring music in the mind, music that feel like the sweet sound of a damsel's anklets. The white snow brings alive the beauty in her veil, in her drapes that blanket the glacier. The shimmering sunlight in the waters glow like the necklaces and jewelery that adorn her form and the constant echo of stream awaken the vibrant presence of her sweet voice among these cave walls.As the beautiful words of Adi Shankara flow:

Mano nivruthi paramopa santhi
Sa theerthavarya mani karnika cha|
Gnana pravaha vimaladhi ganga
Saa kasikaham nija bodha roopa||

I am that kasika, which is the form of,
The real knowledge of the soul,
Which is pacifier of the mind,
Which is the greatest consolation,
Which is mani karnika among the holy waters,
And which is the clear flow of knowledge, the Ganga

She is here, she lives here and her ever shining presence brings calm to this world, washing away sins committed, releasing souls to the heavenly abode of Kailasa and keeping the sacred energy of the shrines of Lord Shiva alive as they are bathed in her waters. She is the personification of divine knowledge, she is the spiritual beauty that flows through the heart of the land, this dharma kshetra as Mani Karnika. This is the Ganges, her beauty and her purity that is so pronounced in this world as she descends from her mountainous heavenly abode to purify us.

Gaumukha, that which resembles the face of the cow, the gentleness of the cow and its enchanting beauty can be brought to live within the four walls of our homes. Gaumukha's real beauty, its experience and the enchanting sounds that reveal this celestial world of the Gods, of the river Goddess, of the Devas, of the great abode of Kailasa can be brought into our world, into our homes to be worshiped, to reside and to bless us when living at Gaumukh looks and feels so impossible.

How do we bring this divine experience home? How do we pray for this peace in our busy lives. How do we bridge the gap between that almost disappearing celestial world and ours that echoes of chaos and noise?

Gaumukha Shankha, the divine shell that resembles the face of a cow brings with it divinity that belongs to the heavens. Gaumukha Shankha by nature is so pure and sacred that it blesses the home in which it rests with peace and tranquility, that which is felt at the very feet of Bhagirathi, at the source of the Ganges. How beautiful it is, how strong the experience to realize that the beauty of Gaumukh at the seat of the Himalayas is reborn in the depths of the ocean in a mollusk. How tranquil is the feeling of holding the Shankha close to the ears to listen to the mystical sounds of Gaumukh constantly reverberating within its walls. How pure is the home that is sprinkled with water, fragrant with tulsi that has blessed the water within this Shankha through the day and the night.

Oh son of the ocean, from whose depths the divine Gods have raised you to give us a path to heaven, from whose self one can listen to the constant vibrant presence of the Ganges, I live to listen to the sounds of eternal bliss, to the pranava mantra that constantly vibrates within your walls. Its not the sound of the sea within yourself I hear, it is the music of the Ganges, the music of her waters, the music of her anklets, the music of the mystical penance that sage Bhagirathi performed to bring her down to earth.

As I descend into worship of the great Lord Shiva, as I place pure flowers at the feet of the Gaumukha shankha I raise the divine light in Arti, wondering with amazement over the many ways the Lord makes his presence felt within my humble home, within my heart and within my mind. Oh pure Ganga, who is imbibed in the water within this shell, who blesses the home where this shankha resides, I bow to you divine mother for considering my home, my world capable of being your earthly abode.

Other posts on the Ganges:
Potency of Lord Shiva
Scindhia Ghat, life with the Ganges, Varanasi
Worship at Shiva temple: Ahilyabai Ghat, Varanasi
From Giza and Varanasi to the Milky Way galaxy
Taraka Mantra - Passage to heaven
Manikarnika Ghat: Where life meets the world beyond
Enlightenment on the streets of Varanasi
Varanasi – Along the Ganges

Where are you O Shambho Maha Deva Deva, Shiva

My love for you doesn't seem enough
My thoughts fail me
My contemplation doesn't appear deep enough
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

The mysterious ways of your presence
The depth of your silence
The miracles that strike me in the mind
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

Your beautiful form I bathe my eyes with
Your beautiful songs I melt in
Your grace is all encompassing
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

The moon echoes your silent presence
In the poetry of the mystical night
I can hear the music in the rolling dice
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

The brilliance of a million Suns
The glowing rays of the Sun, of Agni, O the three eyed Lord
Where do I, the old blind fool look for you
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

The Rudram reverberates in my ears
The words awaken my soul
The glowing lamp makes me weep
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

That Primordial sound, will I ever hear it
That profound depth, will I ever reach it
That emotion of undying love, will I ever feel it
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

This Maya has made me a prisoner
This life has imprisoned me in this form
This breath is not enough to make me rise
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

I look for you at the temple
I look for you within my home
I look for you at the peak of the highest mountain
I look for you at the feet of the river Ganges
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

The Rudram echoes all around me
The milk of life bathes your form
The lamp light burn the oil of ignorance
The fragrance of flowers envelopes you
The pure garment adorns your form
The heavens open and shower flowers in worship
The Nayanars meditate deep at the precincts
You dance in Ananda, to the sound of the damaru
Ma Parvati graciously looks on
You raise your divine foot of light
Place it on my being, my ignorance
You are with me and guiding my through life
And yet...
Where are you O Shambho, O Mahadeva

Shambho Maha deva deva, Shiva
Shambho Maha deva devesa Shambho,
Shambho Mahadeva deva.

Prostrations to He who blesses us with prosperity,
Prostrations to the greatest God,
Prostrations to the abode of peace,
Prostrations to Him, who blesses us with riches,
And Prostrations to him who is the God of Gods.

Related topics:
He presents Himself
The calling - Darasuram Shiva temple
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Tulsi, at the seat of Samadhi

Far away in the ancient country side of Andhra Pradesh, along the silent ripples of the Tungabhadra that toss around the stony sides of this great river course, lies the Samadhi of Sri Raghavendra and 8 other great saints of the 16th cen. AD. There is peace and tranquility all around, and the air is so pure within this strange compound of rocky stones. Its a divine world of silence, of intellect and of superior life that lies buried deep within, under these stones.

What a magical picture it paints in this spectacular moment when the silver rays of the moon toss around the gentle waves of the Tungabhadra and shimmer in the pure waters as it bathes the stone slabs of ancient Samadhis in its silvery presence.

Sri Ragavendra's Samadhi brings alive the presence of divine potency to our existence, one that we would love to strive towards but simply lack the drive, courage and enthusiasm to do so. All that is left to echo back the ancient superior sense of living, are a few boulders of stone uniquely designed and put together to form a structure that resembles the potted Tulsi plant back in our courtyards, the Tulsi Vrindavan.

The original meaning of Samadhi, was not just a burial place of great beings, but a sacred and pure spot that continues to house their mortal remains "mummified" in holy sacred ash within a chamber, purified with worship, sacred mantra and ingredients of worship of centuries long gone. The belief then was that they could return to this mortal body if they chose to come back to our world. The human body buried deep was symbolized more as a vehicle that would house the returning Aatma if it so willed. The purity of sadhana, the evolved sense of living, the divine grace constantly surrounding them, the Samadhis have since grown into places of not just worship but of a silent serene ambiance where herbal purity is felt at its best.

Tulsi, the herbal plant of purity and longevity that wards off disease of any kind is typically housed in today's households within a pot that has a very unique design. The plant is worshiped and considered sacred and has the lady of the house light a lamp at its foot every evening, with a belief that this lamp of divinity will spread the purity of this plant and the superior energy that rises from it around her home and bless the inmates with a more prosperous life. But this light also makes me believe that its original intention was probably to revere the great soul buried beneath in the original prototype of such a structure - the Samadhi.

The shape of the Tulsi pot in the house strangely looks very similar to the traditional design used to make a Samadhi for the departed. This is a small example of purity, a small example of fragrance in the air that will attract all the celestials and siddhars to come and reside within. The much larger example of a great samadhi that hosts a whole forest of herbal plants both tulsi and vilva is that of the great hill of Thiruvannamalai. Here is the living mountain of Lord Shiva that is the home of many siddhas, that is the home of many herbal plants and that which is the home of the great parent Shiva and Parvati. Myths hold that many Siddhas reside here, worshiping the Lord and his consort within this divine hill. The potency of this hill, and the divinity it spreads around itself is beyond words to express.

There is silence within, there is tranquility, and the mind remains blank without thoughts trespassing and rests on the idea of this symbolism in this beautiful plant of unique life promising purity and longevity that grows out of a structure that houses deep within, the most pure form of the human body. A body that is preserved in sacred ash, seated in meditation, lost in eternal bliss. This is the definition of the ultimate form of preservation, of sustenance represented by Lord Ranganatha himself who lies in Ananthasayana, as the world churns around him.

With this saturation in symbolism that echos within the mind the very presence of the Lord Preserver, the silence in the mind begins to submerge into this great realm of calm and tranquility, of peace and harmony, of clarity and depth. Let the waters of life role over me, let the stones of every janma fade, let the tree of life take deep root and release me from this misery of living this haphazard meaningless life. I merge with this tree, my soul departs, what remains is a stony presence whose fading memories get washed away by the flowing waters of time.


Picture courtesy: Flickr.com | Copyright©pasulla

Bindu Visarga - A drop of moon on the crown of Tripura Sundari

Tripura Sundari Mandir, Banswara Rajasthan

In the definition of Kundalini, this is the source of creation, represented by the dot or Bindu in the center of the Sri Chakra. The Bindu means the drop or the point, or literally Bindu Visarga which is the falling of the drop. This is represented by the crescent moon and a white drop which is the nectar that is dripping down from the Vishuddhi chakra. It is the ultimate source of immortality, that state which is called bliss when this chakra is activated through sadhana.

"From that Bindu came ether, air, fire, water, earth and the letters of the alphabet" - Kama Kala Vilasa

The Bindu is connected with the Vishuddhi Chakra and its seat is at the back of the head, typically where brahmins leave a tuft of hair growing. It is believed during sandhya, the brahmin ties this tuft of hair tighter, and while he practices mantra, he develops a powerful and continuing awareness of this Bindu point. This is one of the traditional methods of accessing the Bindu Visarga consciously.

In Tantra, Bindu is depicted by the crescent moon on a moonlit night. The Bindu is closely related to the kalas, that is the waxing and waning of the moon. The Bindu gives a hint towards the vast void beyond, the Sahasrara. It is said when the Bindu is awakened, the sound of OM is heard within the self. It is also believed that this Bindu, or the moon, produces a very intoxicating secretion, which is nectar or ambrosia or amrita or soma. At this point, the bhakta enters the state of complete bliss and is no longer dependent on the world for sustenance.

Other explanations to the same Bindu define this as the red and the white Bindu, where the red represents the Goddess, alias blood of menstruation. White represents the sperm or shukla. The red Bindu is established as the sun and the white Bindu as the moon, representing the ida and the pingala. There are various interpretations to what the Bindu really is, but what strikes out most is that which is depicted on the crown of Goddess Tripura Sundari or that of the great Lord Kameshwara.

This is a phenomenon that renders the bhakta immortal, supreme and one with the divine. Great sages have made this secret phenomenon understandable to the masses by simple depiction. Simple depiction that hides within itself a supreme phenomenon unknown until contemplated upon.

This is embedded in the depiction, in the music, in the verses, in the songs to the great Goddess Kamakshi, Tripura Sundari. Quoting...

Tripurasundari Vijaya Sthava
[Ode of Victory to Tripurasundari]

Lakshya bhakthi rasardhra hruthsarasije sadbhi sadaradhitha|
Sandrananda mayi sudhakara kala gandojjwalanmoulike||
Sarvani sarana gatharthi samani sachinmayee sarvadha|
Srichakradhi nivasini, vijayathe Srirajarajeswari|| 14

Victory to the Goddess who resides in the center of the Sri Chakra, who lives among those hearts drenched in devotion towards her. She resides in the realm of happiness among those good. She wears the crescent moon on her crown and is the consort of Lord Shiva in her all pervasive form. She consoles those who seek protection in her, who is true knowledge, who is wisdom, who is Bindu, who is bliss all within the self.

Hreengarathraya saputathi mahatha manthrena sampoojitha|
Hothri Chandra sameerana agni jala bhobaswannabhoroopini||
Hamsa sohamithi prakrushtadishanair aradhitha yogibhi|
Srichakradhi nivasini, vijayathe Srirajarajeswari|| 15

Victory to the Goddess Rajarajeshwari who resides at the center of the Sri Chakra, who is invoked by the great chant in the three hreem, who is in the sacred offerings, moon, air, fire, water, earth, sun and sky. Who is worshiped by great yogis who look upon her in the divine form of Hamsa Soham.

Tripura Thilakam
[The Ornament to the Tripurasundari]

Eeshashad unmishada marthya sakhi kusumaavalee vimala tharakaa|
Vrunda Sundara sudhamsu ganda subhagee kruthathi guru kaishikaam||
Neelakunchithga naalakaam nitalabhooshanayatha vilochanaam|
Neelakandasukruthonnatheem, sathathasraye Tripurasundareem|| 3

My heart depends on the Goddess Tripura Sundari who is the greatest treasure of Lord Shiva, who is beauty described in her dense crown of hair which is embellished by the crescent moon she wears, that is surrounded by the very stars of the night sky. This appears like a fully opened flower of the Kalpaga tree. Among her blue locks of hair that gently flow down her crown, and frame her half open eyes that are like lilies blooming in the full moon night.

Lakshm aheena vidhu lakshanairjjitha vichakshanana saroruham|
Yikshukarmuka sarasanopamitha chillkayugamamathallikam||
Lakshaye manasi santhatham sakala dushkrutha kshaya vidhayineem|
Uksha vahana thapo vibhuthimahadaksharam Tripurasundarim|| 4

My mind remains awake towards the Goddess Tripura Sundari, who is beauty personified within the lotus face she has, growing like that of a million moons, and has teeth like the bow of a sugarcane of the God of love, who reduces the effect of all bad acts done, whose blessings is the greatest gift gotten from the worship of Lord Shiva.

The realm of the Goddess, the awakening of the Bindu is a drop of moonlight that descends into the consciousness of the Bhakta awakening him into the Sahasrara, the path to the realization of the void, of the universe beyond. The experience of this is probably far, but the very thought that the moon makes a poetic drop of elixir, brings intrigue and mystery into the subtlety of this great phenomenon, represented by a silver glow of the crescent moon on the face of the Goddess.

References:
Kundalini Tantra: Swamy Satyananda Saraswati, Bihar school of Yoga
Vedanta Spiritual Library.

Sri Chakra Yantra - From Sri Nagar to Ujjain

The secrets of Tantra, the rituals, the powers, the sadhana, and the left path that was once followed in the devi cult apart from that followed by Aghoris towards Lord Shiva Kala Bhairava, leave us wondering about the enigmatic world that governs ancient Hinduism into the realm of higher knowledge.

Devi cult, steeped in enigmatic history and esoteric cult practices with popular followers like Adi Shankaracharya and Ramakrishna Paramahamsa completing their sadhana in this cult, and yet not recommending it to the masses leave me very curious about what is it that was taboo and was not meant for any lesser mortal?

This cult has brought to light, the art of love, the act of sex in ritual and the worship of the woman as the very incarnate of the Goddess and the man as that of Lord Shiva himself... its a silent ritualistic faith very secretive and yet very intriguing. The offering of creative juices, the practice of yogic poses and mudras to raise the self to higher spiritual level involving intimacy leave the layman blinking over what the depths of Hinduism can lead us into when the thick moral over of society is quite something else!

And all this goes back to the most powerful form of worshiping the Goddess - Sri Chakra.

It would be interesting to note that the Shankara matt are great followers of Kamakshi Amman, the Goddess of love, the consort of Lord Shiva. The principles of Advaita teach renunciation of desire towards flesh and lust and the Goddess is envisioned as the Mother rather than a divine consort. These great saints turn towards Shakti as their primordial source of energy and in the ancient times there were scattered across all Shakti Sthals, tantric peethas that were great centers of learning. Its unfortunate that what remains in the mind of the average learner is a fear, and respect for great Tantriks who are better known these days as great performer of magic, magic that we would love to stay away from. These powers invoked the goddess, raw Shakti to descend into the world of mortals and beat the unwitting who trespass into the way of these great sages. Tantriks were not that bad, they were phenomenal alchemists who knew astrology and the art of architecture and were most sort after to erect great temples assisting Kings who poured in their patronage toward religious propagation of faith.

At the pinnacle of this growth curve in the religious history of India, one man made a difference. Adi Shankaracharya brought these dangerous blood thirsty practices to halt and converted most of the bali peethas alias Shakti sthals into civilized centers of worship. And yet, deep mystery lies in two places, both of which were great Tantrik centers of learning, which once encouraged sacrifices of both human and animal to the Cult practice of Sri Vidya and also were great seats of learning in astronomy. And yet there is something strange in both of them!

Sri Nagar - On the banks of the river Alaknanda.

Here is no shrine covered by a man made temple! Here is a boulder that rests face down in the Alaknanda river. What makes this boulder so important, so eerie and so powerful? It is believed that this boulder has on its surface the very form of the Sri Chakra that demanded worship, signifying an ughra form of the Goddess that took the lives of any human who curiously set their glance on it without devotion. The Goddess claimed lives, by death and by bloody sacrifice that left an unsettling feeling in the minds of the masses. Sri Nagar, or the land of Sri Vidhya was a great center of tantrik practices of the left hand path and it took the Great Shankara to come and worship the Mother here in the 8th cen A.D. He is known to have performed a great ritual, one that appeased the Goddess and in the bargain turned the great boulder carrying her emblem face down into the river, hiding her very form from the world ever since. The pure waters continue to flow, the sacred rock rests in silence and all peace reigns again in this region, yet the form of the Goddess was mysteriously hidden from view. This sacred boulder is still worshiped, but the mother has hidden her divine Ughra form for ever.

Ujjain - Harasiddhis temple of Goddess Annapurni

This is the uncanny reality of the Sri Chakra, buried into a river bed in one place and displayed in all her flamboyance in another place. This is in the great city of Ujjain, one of the greatest Shakti Sthals that hosts the sacred shrine of Harasiddha Gauri, another form of Annapurni Mata. Though the exterior of this temple reeks of modernism of the times, the inner walls and ceiling speak of spectacular concepts in tantra. The sacred shrine within hosts the divine smiling Mother who decorates a sacred stone in vermillion and chandan. This is her form here, quite simple and yet powerful. Ujjain was a great seat of tantrik worship, and the original prototype of the Hindu Panchang(calendar) took its root here. It is believed that the Bhumadhya rekha [possibly the prime meridian] passes through here and thus makes this town the seat of all astronomical learning and calculations [this information may not be authentic]. Here is where the link between the celestial world and human world is defined through the science of tantric astrology. The walls and ceiling of the Harasiddhi temple are a living library of astrological significance. Here the Sri Chakra has been described on the ceiling, with hundreds of deities in their personified forms within this elaborate diagram, quite the opposite of what hides deep and buried in the waters of the Alaknanda.

This contradiction to thought, this display of apparent difference between two shrines, of which both are great power centers and both were great seats of tantricism at some point in India history, now appear to be cloaked in divine innocence that one echoed a language of death sacrifice. Makes me want to ask, what is the Sri Chakra, what is the essence of the Goddess and what is her power that makes her so great, so deep, so unattainable and so potent that no mortal stands a chance except be her humble devotee!

Reference and image:
Tantra Unveiled: Seducing the Forces of Matter & Spirit
By Rajmani Tigunait

Path to Shivahood in the Thirumanthiram

Every seeker wishes to know the way and wants every delusion cleared. Yet there is frustration and lack of knowledge on how one should even proceed in this path. It raises the deep question on why am I born human?

What is the meaning of being human?

The beauty of Thirumular's explanation is that it removes the veil of Maya straight away by presenting this concept to us. Being human is a state, its not me or you, but a state that we have taken on in this birth. This quite simply answers the question - Who am I. Aham Brahmaasmi - That I am/That thou art.

I am not human as much as I am consciousness in this form of a human in this period of time, in this kaal. I breathe because I have taken birth and in this birth my purpose is to raise myself to not just the state of a sidhha or a deva but to raise myself to the state of Shivahood. Is it possible, it is and Thirumular explains how.

Many people center their spiritual progress to offering 5 to 10 mins of puja, offering Archanai at a temple, and/or following few steps to do a parigaram to ward off immediate troubled forces created by planets and yet they wish for wealth, prosperity and progeny. Thirumular attributes all this to the path of Kriya where, though it is beneficial it also accumulates karma. We cannot consider our spiritualism as complete by any of these methods.

Thirumular further goes to explain that the nature of the supreme atman cannot be discovered or experienced by the senses hence it is vain on our part to hope to achieve salvation through our senses. Just as it is in the nature of the sun to rise in the east, one cannot wish it to rise from the west, similarly it is in the nature of the divine to be realized through contemplation and jnana and not just through momentary archanai/puja or action.

The higher form of worship is in the mansion of the mind, our mind, that which only we can control.

Offer oblations in love
Light lamps golden,
Spread incense of fragrant wood
And lighted camphor in directions all
Forget your worldly worries, and meditate
You shall attain rapturous mukti true

Worship is in the consciousness of the mind, where oblations are offered with love, lamp lights appear golden and the fragrance of incense spreads around the Lord. Burn camphor in all the four directions and forget all your worldly worries for a while, this time is for just meditate on the Lord. It is a state of bliss and peace that is achieved over time with practice. Ritual helps us do this with discipline and as one rises in their spiritual curve this turns into a conscious activity in the mind, rhythmic and simple as one tunes in their mind to spend some silent moments with the self.

The beauty of this practice is explained in another passage:

Even when other men's wives approach them
They touch them not
They have mastered passions all
Their mind is preoccupied perpetually
With offer of oblation diverse
They worship prostrating low
Constantly chanting mantra
Thus in the mansion of the mind they abide.

In the realistic world today seduction is an art not just known to women but men as well and these temptations can come from any where, to both genders included. Excluding the chauvinism in the verse that is very male centric, the essence applies to all. When the mind is so deep in the thought of Lord Shiva, in the conscious state it dwells on him in worship, and all passions are mastered and controlled. The mind doesn't waver, and the oncoming temptation doesn't affect it leaving the bhakta far from falling prey to seduction.

Thirumular quotes:

They know not to reach him by jnana divine,
They seek him by ways of senses, in vain
If within you constantly seek him in the right way
You shall indeed be in nadanta

As one rises up the charts of evolved spiritualism, kriya path gives way to that of jnana. Contemplation takes over action.

Bhaktas, yogis and jnanis do not take to kriya path but instead move into jnana and reach the state of Nadanta.

Yourself himself becoming
And himself yourself becoming
And with two none
And as one Shiva becoming
When thus it is,
Those who went the way of kriya
If they take to jnana
They with Shiva one become
They who seek kriya
May but devas be

There is so much inner beauty in this passage. By being in dhyana and contemplating regularly one can attain Shivahood. By mere practice of ritual in momentary intervals one can best hope to reach the state of being Deva. If the mind dwells entirely on Shiva, it entertains no other thought and life's problems appear like states of living without any attachment.

Problems are accepted situations and conscious mind time is spent in single point concentration leaving the mind passionate of Lord Shiva thus elevating the soul to a constant state of Shivahood.
In this state OM rises from under the navel, VA rises from the throat stretched, NA has its seat in forehead and bindu and nada are still placed higher. Nectar or amrit flows from the 7th centre, the bright light of jnana glows at the 8th chakra, in the 11th chakra lies the supreme and beyond it is the void described as the dwadasanta space.

In this world that we live in, in this stressful world that we belong to, time, contemplation, passion and persistence are the possible characteristics that can lead us closer to salvation.

* Dwadasanta is the mystical place 12 units above on the head counting from the region of the third eye between the brow. Each unit is an angula, measuring 1 division on the finger.
Courtesy: Excerpts from the Thirumanthiram written by Sage Thirumular.

Shakti Peetha, Chamundeshwari - Chamundi Hill, Mysore

Chamundi Hill, read the board as the car took the right to ascend the hill that overlooks the little town of Mysore. Civilization has since grown and is slowly replacing old world charm with new. As the car turns through hair pin bends, the mind looks over the landscape in anticipation of the Goddess, who has since resided here, ever since the previous yuga when Shakti destroyed herself and her hair fell here on this sacred ground.

My mind lingers over the twists and turns in my life that made me come and visit the Goddess Chamundeshwari again. She brings an aura along with herself, that of shakti, of silence, of a slight uneasiness that over powers the mind. There is a mixed emotion to want to realize what great powers are preserved here which have now crystallized into a small temple for Chamundeshwari devi.


As we approach the entrance, I look at the steps leading up into a smaller entrance. Silver covers the doors, and transforms this whole ambiance into a totally different world. Goddesses of all kinds descend down onto the doors and bless the visiting Bhaktas, this is a theatrical moment as one walks in and the cool air breezing through the walls wakes us up to a heavenly world of beautiful Goddesses echoing the realm of Shakti Peetha. This Shakti peetha echoes of ancient cult practices, of vermilion kumkum smeared across the Goddess forehead and that of the fresh offering lying in waiting - that of an animal, of man, of me.

I closed my eyes and thought deep, I feel I have been here as I descended towards the balipeetha. The power of the Goddess beckons, and I swoon to its tune placing my head over the Balipeetha in complete surrender. Inscribed with the Goddess's feet in the center, this broad stone has felt the knife edge and has been bathed in blood, my blood. Blood flowed loose here, with human sacrifices that might sound chilling but when I place my head here, it doesn't feel wrong anymore! I am here to sacrifice myself, this life, this breath at the feet of the Goddess. What better death can I wish for as I lay my head here for the Goddess to severe and hold in her hand, as my blood flow down as an offering in her cup that she holds in her left hand. My mind I place here for her to control, to take as I merge into her!

As darkness took over I lay here, long ago, my head resting on this sacred stone at this small temple, the walls echoed with mantra bathing my being. As the fire in every oil lamp lit up this little temple, the Goddess residing at its center, descended to my side. Chamunda, in her original wild and untamed form came close and gently towards me, emaciated and present as the consort to Bhairava now sat close by and looks at me with loving eyes. As I lay across this Balipeetha I turned in to look at the Goddess within, the same Chamunda Devi put on a very tamed and warm exterior, decked in flowers and jewelery.

Among the bellowing flames that rise, the Goddess is invoked in sacred syllables that bring her power alive. As the holy water is sprinkled over me and my forehead is anointed with holy vermilion, I breathe slowly listening to the sacred words go by.

Lankayam Shankari devi, Kamakshi Kanchika pure|
Pradyumne Shrinkhala devi, Chamunda Krouncha pattane||

Invoking the Shaktis, Goddess Shankari Devi in Lanka, Kamakshi in Kanchipuram, Goddess Shrinkhala in Pradyumna and Chamunda Devi in Chamundi Hill...

The mind sinks into itself, the water trickles down my spine purifying me the sacrificial offering, and the oil lamps light up my face as the incense forms a gentle cloud of dancing celestial world around me. As I look up to the Mother dressed in a garland of skulls, the sweet notes of a conversation pierce the silence of the night.

Sanaischara Uvacha|

Bhagawan deva devesa krupaya thwam jagat prabho|
vamsakhya kavacham broohi mahyam sishyaya|
they anagha yasya prabhavath devesa Vamso vrudhir jayathe||

Oh God, Oh God of Gods, Oh Lord of the universe, please be kind and reveal that Armour to this faultless disciple of yours, which deals about family and by the power of which, the family will grow.

Soorya Uvacha|

Kantam rakshathu Chamunda hrudayam rakshathachiva|
Eesani cha bhujou raksheth kukshim nabhim cha kalika||

Let my neck be protected by Chamunda Devi
Let my heart be protected be her consort Bhairava Shiva
Let my arms be protected by Isana
Let my belly and navel be protected by Kalika Mata

I look up as the mantras rise, I stare up to the axe that waits, I look up to the Mother who holds me covered in vermilion, fearsome to all but warm and pleasant to me, a beautiful garland of skulls she wears, a garland of which I shall soon be a part. Oh Mother of Parasurama, Oh divine form of Kali, Oh divine daughter of the sage Mathanga, Oh Shambhavi divine consort of Lord Shiva, I give up my life to you, I offer my blood to you, I offer my breath to you. I merge into you.

With the rising tempo that echoes among these walls, this theatrical world creates this illusion as I pass from this world to the next. The shining tip of the axe lets loose and the Mother awakens my soul, as it rises up from this sacred stone, this sacred bed of mine, this balipeetha.

This Balipeetha stands here today, silent and cold. It was once my bed, it was once wet with my blood, on it long ago lay my corpse, on this stony bed my life was an offering. Am here I stand, wondering why, wondering what, wondering how.

Related topics:
A night with Nava Shakti - Chamunda
Chaunsath Yogini temple
The killing of Mahishasura on Vijayadasami
Ekapada Shiva - The one legged Shiva

Photo courtesy:
Virtual Tourist® ©1994-2009 VirtualTourist.com
Flickr.com: Sundari

Mount Kailasa, Divine Paradise on Earth

One of the greatest known in the Bhakti movement and better known as a follower of Vaishnavism was Chaitanya Mahaprabhu who composed the Shivashtakam. An excerpt is given below:

Namo namasthe tridaseshwaraya
Bhoothadhinathaya mridaya nithyam|
Ganga tharangothida bala Chandra
Choodaya Gauri nayanothsavaya ||

Salutations and salutations to him,
Who is the Lord of the thirty gods,
Who is the Lord of all beings,
Who is perpetually gracious,
From whose head the waves of Ganga are born,
Who wears the crescent of moon
And who is the feast to the eyes of Gauri,

Sutaptha chamikara Chandra neela
Padma pravalambudha kanti vasthrai|
Sa nrutya rangetha vara pradhaya
Kaivalya nadhaya vrusha dwajaya ||

Salutations and salutations to Him,
Who is like the moon resembling the molten gold,
Who wears dress of the colour of blue lotus and rich cloud,
Who gives boons while he is dancing,
Who is the Lord of salvation,
And who has a bull in his flag.

His imagery of Lord Shiva as Kailasanatha who sports the moon on His head, from whom the Ganges flows and who is dressed in the color of a blue lotus and rich cloud brings alive the beauty of Mount Kailasa.

Mount Kailasa, the abode of Lord Shiva, is paradise on earth where the mridangam of Nandikeshwara can be heard around the rocky boulders. Its a cold snow capped world in ice that sings in praise of Kailashanatha, where Ravana meditated and chose to take this very Kailasa back to his country. This is that rocky and icy cold terrain that Karraikkal Ammaiyar chose to climb, with her hands, such devotion is unmatched!

With the strong chilling winds eating into the skin, and the harsh terrain testing our endurance while we attempt the parikrama of this great Peak with limited energy reserves, all theories of the Linga representing a phallic symbol depicting the great God quickly fade away into the books.



In this bleak climate, trekking through boulders and glaciers there is little room for stories. The first sight of Kailasa, built up on anticipation can bring emotions so strong that all else just fails to ring a bell. This IS paradise, land where the earthly winds bring in the song of the Gandharvas, land where stones reverberate echoing the sound of the mridangam, land where the clear night sky and the cloudy cloak on the Great Kailasa just stops the heart from beating. This is paradise, this is beauty, this is sublime.

The pure waters of the Manasarovar reveal just how untouched this land is, how clear and pure this land is, far away from human existence. Sweet water, shimmering drops of sunlight and rhythmic sounds embedded in every ripple give a glimpse of what the heavenly world is up ahead. Reflecting in these crystal clear waters far in the horizon stand the great Kailasa.

The holy dip in the sacred waters of the Manasarovar purify the mind and the thoughts, for now the peak of Kailasa doesnt feel any more like a mountain at all. No, this appears now like the very forehead of the Lord, the horizontal rocky contours form the patterns of lines on the forehead, and the snow capped sides appears like the three lines of white ash that cover the Linga's Shiva bhaga. The deep crevasse running vertically down its center looks far more than just a geographical coincidence. As the pure waters of the Manasarover trickle down my face that vertical split down the center of the mountain appears more like the half opened third eye of Lord Shiva himself.

In this earthly world that is, as the sun rises and falls, as the winds sing in my ears, I now stand small in front this great phenomenon. The three eyed Lord sits on an icy throne, in deep meditation as the snow laden earth hides this power of his third eye that lies dormant, unnoticed by all.

There are no words to express the workings of the supernatural world, there are no theories to prove, there is only time to realize how wasteful we have been with this consciousness called life, the only sign of which is in the air I breath as my heart pounds awaiting this phenomenon to descend on me.

Stark among low mountains, this imposing wall of heaven rises high in front of me. Robed in silken clouds the Lord silently meditates. The earth is pure, this air is pure and these waters are pure and as I freeze, my emotions well up in the form of tears and I wonder, is this the great Peak of Kailasa that resides deep in every temple sanctum scattered around the Indian country side?

As we scale across the terrain taking this path for three days, crossing every ridge on the way numbering 5, I am left to belief, this is Shiva himself, this is the beeja mantra, this is Panchakshara, this is Na Ma Shi Va Ya, oh this is the Lord of dance, of victory, of conquest over sin, of endurance, of peace, of music, of life, of breath, of emotions, I feel Him in every beat, i feel Him in every pulsating nerve, I feel Him in the chill, I feel Him wake my emotions, I feel Him in the silence of my mind.



My heart beats faster, I am so small in front of this majestic imposing peak and i have no thoughts left in my head, I have no feelings left for the world, I have no worry that awaits me in time, I am nothing but a speck of nature, created to witness this greater consciousness that flows down in the form of a pure stream of melting icy water.

Oh Lord Shiva, this mind is numb, its swoons to your presence, it wants to break the shackles of its limits, it feels the presence of you as I collapse over these stones on which I stand. My consciousness fades, as I stare up to your being, the great peak that pierces the night sky, so clear with stars as the moon glows, almost resting on your side. This is what I lived for, this is what I missed all these years, this is all i am capable of, as my vision is covered with heavy tears of overwhelming love. I dont want to go back, I dont want to leave, I dont want to move any more... I wish to lie here and witness your beauty in every breath.

O Lord hold me close, take me with you, grant me a vision of your sublime self, just once for me in this earthly dwelling of mine. Guide me into your world. Take me into your paradise, as I leave this earthly body behind. Help me up the steps to this celestial world of the Gods, my soul knows nothing else, my breath slowly starts to fade. The winds sing louder as the known world fast drifts away. I am nothing, I am not... I am another drifting soul that has merged into the heavenly world of the Lord.

Om Na Ma Shi Va Ya|

Reflections on the Trinity - Trimurti Shiva

I breathe in the fresh air, I feel the pure dew in my palm. I look up in Surya Namaskaram to the Sun God and my heart sings out the Aditya Hrudayam.

Esha brahma cha Vishnuscha shiva skanda prajapathi|
Mahendro, dhandha kalo yama somo hyapam pathi ||

The sun climbs the clear sky, the warmth bathes my soul. He is Brahma, He is Vishnu, He is Shiva and He is Skanda. He is the progenitor of the human race, He rules the celestials, He rules the devas, He is that which shines in the gold of Kubera, He rules life in all the worlds known. He is kala, He is time, He sets in our minds at the time of death, He rises again mirrored in the moon.

I see the presence of Trimurti, I breathe in this fresh air and I look up to the sun. In this bright light I see the Trimurti shining down on me.

***

I sit in silent meditation, lighting this lamp with its wick dipped in a pool of pure ghee. Lighting the match as I ignite this flame and hold it up, my mind is silent and I hear the sacred words.

Deepamjyothi Parabrahma|
Deepamjyothi Janardhana||
Deepo me hara tu paapam|
Deepaa Jyothir Namostute||

In this light I worship Lord Brahma, in this flame I worship Lord Vishnu (Janardhana), in this flame I burn my sins and to this flame I bow, to the great Lord Shiva.

I see the presence of Trimurti, I imbibe their essence present in this flame. I light this sacred fire in my heart before I commence my prayer to Lord Shiva. This flame I light every morning, this flame I light at sunset, with this flame I welcome, the Trimurti to reside in my home.

***

I look up at Lord Shiva, I look up at the Linga. The divine form remains etched in my mind as my heart worships the trinity.

I worship the Linga, this beautiful form at the Brahma Bhaga which I cannot see.
I worship the Linga, this grace present on earth as it rises in front of me as the Vishnu Bhaga
I worship this Linga, at its head where lies the essence of all energy that lies here capsuled, that controls this universe at the Rudra Bhaga.

I witness the presence of Trimurti Shiva in this form, that envelopes the three Great Gods - Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva - into the single form of Sadashiva.

***

This moment is sacred, this moment is pure and this moment is everlasting as I raise this Vivla to offer to the Lord in worship.

Moolatho brahma roopaya, madhyatho Vishnu roopini|
Agratha shiva roopaya, Eka bilwam shivarpanam||

I offer this leaf of Vivla to Lord Shiva, this leaf so pure and divine. I hold this leaf with Lord Brahma resides at its base, Lord Vishnu who resides in the stem and Lord Shiva who resides at its top. With my soul enveloped in this divine leaf, I offer this leaf without any flaw to the Lord and with this I pray for perfection.

Such a perfect leaf, with each left part denoting Surya, Chandra and Agni. How potent and pure is this leaf that has the trinity residing within it.

***

The Lord stands on apasmara, the Lord stands one legged crushing my ignorance. The Lord Ekapada Shiva stands as the Trinity, as Trimurti Shiva who rises with Lord Brahma and Lord Vishnu on his side.

Shivam Shantham jagnannatham|
Lokanugraha karakam||
Shivamekapadam nithyam|
Shikaraya namo nama||

This is the Panchakshara, a part of which is the letter Shi, To Lord Shiva who resides in its essence. Who is the keeper of peace and who preserves this world and all its creation. Who creates life in the form of Brahma, who preserves life in the form of Vishnu and who releases the soul in the form of Shiva. To the great Lord Trimurti Shiva I bow.

The all pervading Lord Shiva Trimurti echoes everywhere around me, in the morning sun, in the flame of the lamp I light, in the very form of the Linga worship, in the pure vilva leaves I offer in prayer. He resides deep within my intellect as Ekapada Shiva, crushing my ego to uplift my being.

Kalahasti, Where the Divine Lord Breathes

Lost among ancient hills, overpowered by the most popular shrine at Tirupati, the endless highway winds around low hills and the green countryside of Andhra Pradesh leading a seeking devotee straight to the temple gates of Lord Shiva at Kalahasti.

Among the noise and clatter, with vendors selling flowers to those selling Rahu Ketu puja to officials offering special darshan, Kalahasti has every sign of a living temple today. In the midst of all this noise, and wading through half of India’s moving population on foot, finding our way through the maze of metal walkway, the freedom of Kalahasti has long gone giving way to just “one way traffic”. Yet there is peace here, yet there silence if only we care to hear it. As people pay through to see the Lord, getting into occasional wars right in front of the shrine, shouting abuses in the interior halls of the sacred temple, this is the other India, the other Hinduism that clearly shows the lack of spiritualism among the ignorant masses who visit.

And yet, peace can be won. A trained mind that can concentrate is all one needs to switch off the sound of the madness and switch onto the sound of the Lord’s breath within his shrine chamber. Here it is a completely different world. The shrine chamber well decorated with silver plated exteriors flanked by two dwarapalas and two priests houses a spectacular concept within. The air here is pure, the experience is overwhelming and the emotions pour into a river of sacred syllables that flow over all the senses that cut out the worldly noise. This is the entrance to the divine presence of the Lord of Kailasa. The ardha manadapa (vestibule) is a room large enough to capture this essence that emanates from within, for what lies within is much more than just wind, just vayu… the Lord breathes here, he lives here, he is here.


Nandi, sits at his door and look up to him in silence, his breath in rhythmic patterns recites the Panchakshara as it cuts through the noise to reach the Lord, a divine dialog of which we are just “not” a part but also fail to understand that we should not even cross this sacred space. And here I stand right in the middle of it with no choice but to view the Lord within.

The air is still, the tiny lamps flicker making a halo of light around this extraordinary linga that is not made out of black stone. A narrower shaft rises out of the peetha, with the representations of a spider at its bottom and two stumps on it that give the feeling of gaja rupa, the form of an elephant. Rising straight up to cover the Lord’s head is the serpent power, a five hooded snake. These sacred emblems are not directly seen, as they are covered by the jeweled starry crown that the Lord wears to protect us, the Navagraha Kavacha. The navagrapha, the nine planets who adorn Him, are represented by nine strips of sacred metal, with three stars in each row representing a star. The whole kavacha invoked in one’s worship, with mantra recited thrice, one for each star brings the sacred count to 27, blessing the devotee with lesser pain through their karmic lives.

The Lord represents the universe, the living emblem within which we live, he is breath that pulsates within this chamber, the only witness being the hanging lamp whose flame never dies, never stops a dance, sways as he breaths to indicate to the world that he IS, he lives, he resides here. As the great moment arrives, devotees stand is queues, waiting for those sacred few seconds where they witness a picture, not too easy to catch.

This is the divine abhishekam, the only chance where we can see the Lord in his form, where the Navagraha Kavacha is removed and placed alongside. In the dimly lit interior, with priests silently pouring sacred water over the Lord, who towers within the center of his chamber, this view is breathtaking. He stands on a stark square peetha, made of stone and rises in the center of a lit up interior. The water flows down his sides, with a million lights flickering on its shaft as it flows down, covering his divine being. The lamp dances on, as the cool air within brings a strange peace a strange fragrance to the approaching devotees. The air is still and yet in all the noise one can hear the divine sound of Panchakshara, Om Na Ma Shi Va Ya resounding within the walls. In tune is the damaru, the sound of creation as one imagines Nandikeshwara play the mridangam. In these divine sounds, is embedded my breath, a rhythm that slows down to imbibe the beauty of this place.

The mind is silent, the sacred Mrityunjaya rhythmically rambles on in my mind, followed by the Rudram that plays music in my mind as the sounds of creation get louder. The breath of the Lord, sends ripples through the air, pulsates with my being as I leave everything in the known world behind. This is life, this is reality, this is being in the presence of creation, that which never ends. This is the world of Lord Shiva, one of silent energy, one of real truth, one that transforms an ever noisy temple seeped in corruption into a divine chariot that floats through the air, occasionally nudged by the divine breath of the Lord within the chamber.

As the bhakta walks out, with the heart floating in this divine chariot, the world in the outer hall way personifies divinity, through all the jailed illusion. Shiva lingas adorn the precincts, redefining the glory of the lord. As the sun penetrates through a small window in the west wall, and bathes a silent linga seated on its pedestal, it’s the only form I can touch and perform namaskaram to. Holding the peetha with my hands and placing my head at his divine feet, in complete surrender to the Lord, I pray for enlightenment. This moment is pure, he is near and he is listening to the feeble voice that comes out from within. I wish I could have hugged him, and stayed there to just talk to him. I move on as I am controlled by Kala, by time. Each corner is divine, graced by Kalabhairava who stands handsome with his dog and trishul, with a bowl in his hand. Near him sit the Sapta Matrika, or Sapta Kannigai elegantly seated displaying a certain wilderness in their posture. In the south corner lies the divine spatica, crystal clear and shining. This is the divine pantheon of surrounding Lord Shiva and his divine consort. This is the sacred beauty of Kalahasti, this is the heavenly world on earth. We are so close and yet in our minds we are so far.

All I can think of is praying to the Lord to ward away my troubles!

Grahanaam aadhi radhithyo Loka Rakshana Karaka |
Vishama sthana sambhootham Peedam harathu may ravi ||

Please steal away my problem O Sun, the first of all the planets that adorn the Lord’s chest. You are the cause of protecting the world and you are the cause of trouble by the position you hold at the time of my birth.

This prana feels trouble but isn’t it the essence of life, trouble IS because I am born, trouble IS because I don’t accept, trouble IS because I desire more and more. Isn’t it unfortunate that I don’t desire the presence of the Lord in my conscious life as much as I desire something that doesn’t exist? Doesn’t this make me look really miserable?

I stand here, an ignorant fool who thinks I know how to live. I stand here a coward because I cannot face life. I stand here a human because I am limited and inadequate. I stand here in this birth because I am still imperfect. I stand here with all my sorrows because I am Apasmara.